Oh man. It finally happened. I came unraveled at the seams. Completely unglued. It wasn't pretty...I think its one of the only times I've ever felt genuinely sorry for hubs. I unraveled all over him...
Anyhow, I don't sleep at night much. Every time I close my eyes, there he is. By morning I'm so exhausted that I eventually collapse about an hour before the kid wakes up. When she gets up, I get up - but only to make her breakfast. There are days that I can hardly pry my ass off the couch at all. I feel worthless and useless. I'm existing, but that's about the extent of it. I exist long enough to get the kid what she needs at intervals throughout the day. She's not neglected, though. I just rarely play with her anymore. I feel so bad, but I'm scared that I'm going to come unglued on her. That would be the worst. I'm not talking about beating her or anything. Its one of those never-ending crying spells that I fear the most when it comes to her. She wouldn't understand. She'd freak out if she saw it.
I'm in a weird place right now and I can't wait to leave!!
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